The Tower

I envy the colleagues here who’ve enjoyed this low-budget chase in a tower. I like monsters in horror films, and I also like derelict buildings, but this one didn’t make it for me. It was an utterly unscary stroll around a carousel of terrors with a monster jumping out at every corner. You can appreciate the decent make-up, but I can’t say I felt even a hint of tension or atmosphere. The script is almost non-existent and the performances not only are weak, but also downright irritating. Compared to the low-budget Irish-British production Citadel, this tower comes out as a clear loser. And that’s not due to financing, but due to its inability to tell a story and the important fact that it’s just a monotonous series of gimmicks. For me it feels like 1 star, I’m giving it the second one out of goodwill for the make-up. But I understand the others. It reminded me of that time when at a certain Asian restaurant I spent about 120 crowns on a “fried ice-cream fruit mix” and then I tried to convince myself that it was actually quite good, strange and untraditional. But it wasn’t. It was inedible, actually. (2014.03.14)