Scalpelexis

I'm probably too nostalgic for the original Mummy films with Fraser and as such I found this version with Cruise to be a dreadful bore, since I associate The Mummy with good gags and Tom with better action. The humor is almost absent (hints of strained jokes) and for how serious it pretends to be, half the film can’t even be taken completely seriously. I didn't even like the idea of using Crowe's character to possibly expand The Mummy into the more extensive fantasies of unrelated realms. After a few days, the film literally disappeared from my mind.

Here the writers literally ran out of steam and it seemed to me that the story was planned out for those 2 or so seasons but they couldn’t manage to end it in the second one. Truly, the first 2 episodes were the proverbial last pages and after that there was an unnecessary stilted epilogue where everyone had to sort out their inner complexes and social issues in relationships and one character had to establish a new order in order to convince himself, despite his omniscience, that it wasn't the real Lotus. The entertainment literally ran off to places in the galaxy where the story had rather sporadically and bizarrely failed to go. I liked DOTA better in the D&D fantasy mode, with character development and exploration of the lore and the outside world. None of that was on the menu anymore; indeed, I wouldn't sign up for the verbal haggling of all the characters or the bogged-down, overdone fight sequences even if I had no other choice. I hope we don't revisit this particular storyline, and I'll be waiting all the more for the next installment of Arcana. I would never have believed that I'd rank LoL higher than DOTA anywhere. A better 2 stars.

A surprisingly harsh, body-ripping, and above all fresh idea to place the extraterrestrial hunter among the Indians. The film strikes an artful balance between the more intimate atmosphere of the American forests during the colonial era and the unbounded bloodlust of the Predator, which the film constantly parades shamelessly past the camera with minimal pauses. The protagonist doesn't come across as a woke celebration of feminism, but a believable student of hunting who thinks logically. The script doesn't really waste time with anything, the plot hurtles along, and so its a bit of a disappointment that the final fight is a rather weak one that a predatory audience wouldn't give its champion a medal for. Decent fun for a single-serve action film, and in the context of its rather inferior predecessors, this representative of the franchise makes it to a weak 4 stars by the skin of its dreadlocks.

Yeah, uh, okay. Once you start apologizing too often, the characters start making confusing decisions too often and are too often given roles/abilities that are out of character or there are too many situations like "Gee, I have to get rid of him, but I can't because I’d end up getting rid of someone else, so I have to get rid of still another person...but I just can't", then you know you're starting to run around in circles, and by the end of Season 3 it's sad to say that we've gotten nowhere. The characters are severely underused, be it The Seven or even Soldier Boy himself, and I didn't enjoy any of them, quite the opposite. I fear that too much melodrama will lead to too many seasons.

My relationship with vampires in anime (which, let's not kid ourselves, applies for the live-action variety as well) is quite stunted, with the classic rule of exceptions proven in the form of the marginally stirring Bakemonogatari or the cults-warming/lovingly sinning Hellsing. I have yet to see the iconic Shiki, though, so I'm leaving the final conclusion open despite this representative. Curiously, one of Vampire in the Garden's earliest episodes was the bloodsucking rodent-infested shōnen Seraph of the End, which in the studio's current portfolio has the flash of a Russian souvenir stand amidst the wonders of the world. Their comeback with a slightly more poetic tale about the reunion of an unremarkable human girl with a bored, humanistically-educated vampire noblewoman (strangely, her garden made it into the series' title on the basis of only 2 minutes of footage?) turned out even rougher than when these creatures get a full salvo of light cannon. The emotional basis of the story is downright disastrous: we're pointlessly made to sympathize with a run-of-the-mill girl who, after X years betrays her race, which is defending itself night after night from being massacred by vampires. Even though she lives in an industrial hell evocative of inhospitable Siberia, nonetheless she trades relative safety for escape into a frozen unknown that is anything but safe. And at the same time, we are expected to comprehend that the vampire queen, still living at an andante tempo in a preserved castle, is being easily enticed out of nowhere into a little war campaign, where she oddly decides to risk her neck for a random girl from the other side of the lines. The getting-to-know-you sequence that follows is the best, most believable, and most endearing part, but once we get back to the life of a sheep and a wolf under the same roof, it gets hard to reconcile/easy to, um, sink your teeth into what the promised land actually is or the awkward and perpetual "I'll save you so you can save me next time" nonsense, and things all promptly go down the toilet. This isn’t helped by the undeveloped side characters whose purposes in terms of the story are largely two-dimensional, or the immersion in raging idiocy like amateur CGI car wrecking or vampires carrying things/people in flight when their claws turn into wings. The ending is predictable and the message of the entire series fizzles out into a 404 error. The animation is unusually mediocre for Vampire in the Garden, and above all the simple character design did not appeal to me when compared to the detail of the surrounding world; the music, on the other hand, was surprisingly solid. That didn't smooth over my general disenchantment, and thus my relationship with vampires received a validation stamp in the "Another Edward" column. 2 stars

Due to a new job opportunity, I've had the opportunity to spend 2 days hiking through the Scandinavian wilderness. Before I did, I was advised to watch this piece for light "acclimatization" :-) I admit that it added a certain authenticity to the uneasiness and fear, because our woods after all end in a friendly village over the hill and an icy shower coupled with really bad weather is a bit rarer here. The behavior of the frustrated travelers was logical within limits, and you have to give credit to the fact that it is the invisible and yet clearly audible evil that robs you of sleep. 3/4 of the time you get chills down your spine and elsewhere, only to end up with a psychotic/action-film ending full of exaggerated occultism solidly kill the wonderfully constructed atmosphere. Considering how well made horror movies have been lately, the creators of Ritual have managed to conjure up a worthy representative of the genre.

There are tons of high-quality anime set during wartime (not girls in tanks or with propellers on their feet) that also bravely take on political and social subthemes, and 86 is definitely one of them. The alternating confrontation between the progressive and San Magnolia residents and the almost Nazi-esque ones and their racist conscription of non-whites into dirty life-or-death battlefields is decently handled, and even if this makes the romance-tinged Romeo and Juliet storyline predictable, none of it bothered me. But what grates rather more than less in the first half is the story and execution. We're kept on healthy emotional alert throughout, whether through fierce spider-mech battles or heartfelt political declarations, but the series can't manage a very deft handling of the ridiculous amount of tasks it has to accomplish in the opening episodes. Every now and then it spouts exposition out of thin air like a La Palma volcano. It knows full well that it has an overwrought ensemble of characters, but its effort to get rid of them are inept. Then we spend far too long on boring Skyping, only to spend the last 2 episodes not knowing what to do with all the extra time. In terms of quality it trends in a true sawtooth pattern, up and down, thankfully coming to an end right at the beginning of the second part. As soon as the series doesn't have to explain anything anymore, it revs up to an absolute maximum in all areas. For me, both the civilized and endearing passages about the newfound life of outlaws in an advanced society and the relentless, adrenaline-pumping racket were handled so well it was unbelievable. Suddenly, the anime seemed tangible to me, and so believable; I could empathize with the feelings of the main characters as they struggled with their new sensations of regular life, followed by the strangely antithetical withdrawal from the war that had raised them. The tenderness of caregivers, the fun and comfort of a good Christmas, and yet on the other hand the anger and despair from an unexpected blow: I experienced all of this as well. The 16th episode was fantastically heartbreaking, while the last episode made me shed a tear of happiness. I'm glad that for once the content above all of the 2nd half is up to the standard of the excellent graphics and music from A-1, who to my great joy announced that they would be continuing with this project. For the 1st "bark" I would hover around a respectable 3 stars; I will unashamedly give the second half a weaker 5 for how I gulped down 86 with gusto.

Ooof, this fell apart rougher than the proverbial house of cards. Most of the time we're forced to endure the over-the-top melodrama of a bunch of teenagers arguing about whether or not we're family if we (un)adopt a random alien while competing with..mutant nuns? The plot is a mutant too, adding elements of random nonsense and constant idiocy to its unusual DNA. The creators have no idea what to do with the Kaiju, so of course we have to puff them up and let them spawn here and there out of nowhere, during which the characters actually move a half step backwards in their development. The theme of redeeming several of them is unintentionally comical because of the zero effect it ultimately achieves. The fight scenes are merely average.

A little parkour fairy. Indeed, in the anime production, this project is confusingly peppered with the biggest names: Tetsurō Araki, the lauded director of Attack on Titan. Gen Urobuchi, the man behind the excellent scripts Fate/Zero, Puella Magi Madoka Magica and Psycho-Pass. Hiroyuki Sawano, one of the most famous composers of anime music in recent years. The dubbers include such stars as Yūki Kaji or Mamoru Miyano, all under the aegis of one of my favorite studios, WIT. The opening immersion and bouncing around in a world sketched out by a giant bubble blower is an incredibly effective audiovisual spectacle; the opulent focus on the watery state is the centerpiece of this animated Tokyo, and I wouldn't be at all surprised if you assume this is another Shinkai, since it's similar in quite a few aspects to his recent Weathering with You. You can see the WIT style above all in the composition of the background against the static images of faces, with the accentuated play of lighting effects frequently found in Vivy: Fluorite Eye's Song. You can't help but enjoy the camera frenzy during the competitions, its endless wrapping around all the athletes' axes. The parkour action sequences are beautifully animated, and the only thing that slightly snapped me out of my reverie was the script's confusion over whether to use the classic run or the ridiculously inappropriate "Naruto run" (Like why even? Surely you don't wear a suit to a ball so you can ultimately put boots on?). And speaking of the script, it was only a slight hint of a bigger noise. I have no idea if Urobuchi slightly flubbed it, it was heavily cut, or if there were other external interfering factors: The inspiration from Andersen's "The Little Mermaid" is beaten into our heads every few minutes, but that shouldn't be allowed to create a fantasy world that is unfinished compared to the original tale and filled with unknown rules, or to churn out a bundle of characters with no backstory and no deeper characterization, and then try to retroactively wrap it in a romantic gift package meant to tug at more sensitive heartstrings. The romance between the fairy and the prince follows the aforementioned pattern and is created with gestures rather than words, but is nothing more than a bland shortcut. The main "wingman" of the script, the visuals, tries to convince the audience of their existing proximity, diligently selling one magical scene after another, but without meaningful actions and chemistry between the lead couple together, it's just a hollow picture, literally an advertisement for silence. The implausibility of the plot seems to be sadly symbolized by the author’s reluctance to have the surrounding characters question or even ponder the supernatural elements surrounding our fairy, or the strange ignorance of her origins. The emotional impact of the last dramatic minutes was thus, for me, like the grand headline of a weak tabloid. As Jeoffrey wrote, it wouldn't have hurt at all to have less action and instead more very fragile bubbly relationships for more touching animation, to put it ironically. It's a waste, a very nice looking waste, and a burst bubble. 3 stars

The eccentric cosplayer (with slightly unconventional character design) Marin, who has her heart (and camera shot) not in the palm of her hand but right in her cleavage, and submissive Gojo, who would rather sew than sleep, even if he’s sewing for extraterrestrials. I wouldn't have expected such a combination of characters and a fair amount of fan service from the pen of a female author, but on the other hand, the topic of cosplay is a welcome fresh introduction to this relatively young hobby. The anime, through the aforementioned perpetually smiling diva, is appealing in its liveliness and unassuming quality; indeed, through the wry, brooding, and good-natured Gojo we are introduced to the technicalities of textiles, which unfortunately I thought were way more interesting than he was. It's impossible not to feel Marin's undying passion for the cause through the screen, and even though she often overdoes it, you'll gladly forgive her for a thousand episodes, but her male counterpart (the entire 1st half of the series, in fact) was nothing but dead weight dragging everything down. I wouldn't be surprised if the respectable frequency of Marin's appearance in scantily clad fashions was the main attraction for many, especially kicked up a notch as it was by CloverWorks' excellent art design (I would have preferred the opposite; a certain bathroom scene by a minor character in particular was nasty FBI bait), but the mopey, overly slavish, same-clothes-wearing, dull-witted, anything-woman-shy Gojou-kun resolutely failed to bring me much in the way of enjoyment. For me, the main immersion, their relationship, kept tripping over the characters’ lack of compatibility and the harmony they needed from each other. I couldn't help it, even though it probably wasn't directly intended that way, I still couldn’t imagine how any healthy or respectful relationship could exist between the queen and her run-of-the-mill and unremarkable servant. These personal doubts of mine began were successfully dispelled by the breathless conclusion with a healthy dose of evolving romance, exploration of the unknown (again the sea, reminding me of the magical scene from Josee, the Tiger and the Fish) and, most importantly, a screen time allocation that rightly kicked the uninteresting side characters aside, leaving the spotlight only to our chosen ones. All it would take is 2-13 injections of a pick-me-up, acceptance of the outside world, a shelf of new t-shirts for our tailor, and we'd be someplace else in no time! And uh... a bit less of the fan service, but that would pit all the waifmakers against each other in the charts :-) My Dress-Up Darling definitely scores points in creativity, a dose of charm that is inconsistent but present, and its love of cosplay, but it doesn't ooze depth, focus, or anything significantly above the average for softer works. I'd have to tape the corners of my mouth to smile at this anime rather than just watching it normally, but I'll tack on a better 3 stars mostly thanks to the production values.